Been a bunch of bull shit

Following is some of the things, i have had to go through, since I came about knowing the truth of abuse while living through it.    Self discovery of such traumatic experiences brings forth an abundant amount of secondary consequences and ever lasting rippling after effects of triggers. Nightmares are at top of reminders to deal with.  Nightmares are something we have no control of as we sleep. I am helpless when it comes to my subconscious mind and reliving various incidents while sleeping has me absolutely lost the while next day. As if life isn't hard enough as it is, to get through without  traumatic stressors.  These stressors have many variables, with some you' ll see a mix of delusional thinking, paranoid behaviours and a lot of individuals go through the revictimization all over again.  They amount of stress reflects on each person differently and to according to their situational circumstances. Depending on the biosocial perspective it varies in ways it actually effect you.  Some individuals are able to stand through much more difficult elements of tramatic events and some aren't able to handle even the slight start of abuse.  Repression of memories are another source of secondary consequences that remain with me thought its been ling ago tha the abuse took place.  These kind of memories are the creator of my PTSD, Post Taumatic Stress that is, causes much anxiety, phobia's and pananic attacks.  Nightmares are the first sign when looking for a diagnosis of PSTD, its also stress related from being exposed to trauma over an unknown amount of time. Another form of secondary after effects would be the inability to maintain a normal intra or personal relationship, premisquity, and they live a very black and white lifestyle with no gray area to say, its one extreme to the next with me.

 

Another side effect that alters the mind of the victim is thier ability to dissassociate from reality, from thier life from the pain.  Which can be quite hard for the victims loved ones.  I know that there are several times i was in a psychosis and walked away from my life for up to a year the last time. At this time I was unable to handle all the pressures and stress that everyday lifes activities where far to much to handle, creating a stronger sub concious and letting them have control so that you arent able to take on the whole break down you go into a trance like state if mund.